OVERCOMING SELF DOUBT
It’s the weekend and Sunday is the most restive day of the weekend as Saturdays are mostly for owambe, conferences some even work on Saturday . Thank God for the Sunday in the calendar. Yesterday, 24th August 2019 I attended a Google sponsored conference on the platform of Women will by GBG Festac. Meehhhnnnn! It was like the organisers know me and the present burden on me. Within, the first five minutes at the programme I knew I was in the right place. The first speaker, Coach Rhalee spoke on Self Doubt and how to deal with it, it was the topic I needed.
I recently got an opportunity for higher responsibility and I have been having the feeling of inadequacy that ‘Ifeoluwa are you sure you can do this?’ Honestly, with the feeling of inadequacy came fear, fear that I am going to fail and I became unhappy. I knew I was in an unhealthy state, so to help myself I repeatedly played ‘Comforter’ by Cece Winans on my phone using ear plugs to help the lyrics sink into my troubled heart. I started feeling better. Listening to Coach Rhalee speak on Self Doubt at the conference was of immense benefit to my spirit, soul and body. In my state of generosity(lol) I will share some lessons gleaned from Coach Rhalee’s Self Doubt talk, you know Dife Epiphany Blog is your lifestyle companion.
Battling with self doubt is technically called ‘The Impostor Syndrome‘, this is when you have doubts in your abilities and this doubt hinders you from reaching your full potential. If you are like me, just know that you are not alone, a lot of people deal with Impostor Syndrome and we are getting out of it! Reasons for self doubt are: Low self esteem, anger, anxiety, negative thinking about yourself, lack of self acceptance, perfectionism, doubtful future, traumatic childhood, frustration, fear, self limiting beliefs, past failures. One of the signs of Impostor Syndrome is constantly deflecting praise, not taking credits for accomplishments. This is when you get compliment like you are beautiful or I love your shoes and instead of saying ‘Thank you’ you highlight the things that you think are not right with what has just been praised like ‘My powder is smearing already or the shoes’ colour is too bright for the clothe’. ‘Hanty’ who ask you? Just enjoy the praise or compliment with relish. Yes, your effort deserves to be recognized so badly in it!
Now, how do you fight and overcome self doubt? Firstly, turn off distractions, turn off things that make you lose yourself. Focus on the positive, don’t give room for anything contrary to your peace. Take some time off for yourself as self-care is important, you can give yourself a treat for a refreshing walk, spa, movies or even just being alone with your self and meditate. Focus on your skills, it helps you feel good about you can accomplish. Don’t be so hard on yourself, dealing with life, everyday stuff and emotions can be tough, allow yourself to cry once in a while to ease off the weight and you pick yourself up to bravely face life again. Don’t be shy or too big to ask for help when you need it.
Hmmmmm, so you gonna end the reign of impostor syndrome and start basking in every moment of your goodness unapologetically. Yeaaa, baby you are a brave soul on a mission, you got this! Watch out for other epiphanies gleaned from the Women Will Conference. Do check out Dife podcast and Dife gallery sections and share the links. You are cherished, enjoy the rest of your weekend.